Health, Mental Health, Mental Toughness
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Stop Playing Small: The World Needs You to Show Up
Somewhere along the way, many of us began to believe that staying quiet about our strengths was a virtue.
We were taught not to “make it about us,” to avoid the spotlight and to let our work speak for itself. But what if playing small isn't about humility at all? What if it’s about fear?
For years, I made excuses for myself and fell into that trap.
I became a world champion.
I earned my MBA and launched a speaking business.
I stood on the Olympic podium with a silver medal around my neck, a mother of two young children.
And yet, I still found myself thinking, “It’s not that big of a deal. Other people have done harder things. I don’t want to come off as prideful.”
Then a mentor asked me a question I’ll never forget:
“How many people in the world have actually done what you’ve done?”
That moment hit me hard. Because the truth is, very few have.
In that moment, I realized that I wasn’t being humble. I was actually hiding.
Brené Brown said it perfectly:
“There are too many people in the world today who decide to live disappointed rather than risk feeling disappointment. This can take the shape of numbing, foreboding joy, being cynical or critical, or just never really fully engaging.”
I didn’t want people to feel uncomfortable or insecure around me because of my awards, accomplishments, or skills, so I would downplay them or avoid the conversation altogether.
I had trained myself to play it safe. I numbed the joy. I kept things light and I avoided drawing too much attention.
And deep down, I knew that playing small wasn’t protecting me. It was limiting me and limiting those around me.
So let me ask you the same question I had to face:
In what ways do I hide behind the word “humility” to avoid vulnerability or attention?
Hiding in Plain Sight
Sometimes we hide in plain sight. We show up, but not fully. We contribute, but quietly. We succeed, but we downplay it.
We convince ourselves we’re being modest, when what we’re really doing is protecting ourselves from the discomfort of being seen.
As Marianne Williamson famously wrote:
“Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.”
Owning your success isn’t about ego, it’s about impact. Your story has the power to light the path for someone else. When we step up and own our story, we give others permission to do the same.
A Mindset Worth Rewiring
Leadership begins with visibility. It’s not for the sake of being seen, but for the sake of those who need to see what’s possible.
The belief that your story has value and that your example could open someone else’s eyes is a powerful shift.
Your Action Step Today
The next time someone compliments your effort or your impact, notice your instinct.
Instead of brushing it off, try saying:
“Thank you. That means a lot. I’m proud of that.”
It may feel awkward at first, but it’s also liberating.
Because your leadership doesn’t begin when others validate you.
It starts when you recognize your value and stop hiding from it.
Your Turn
Have you ever caught yourself playing small, even when you had every reason to stand tall?
What helped you shift? How can you help others?
